Thursday, January 29, 2009

An amazing moment

happened for me today... I was driving D to school today and while we were listening to the radio, the DJ was talking about a tragedy that occurred this past weekend when a father was hit by a drunk driver and the accident killed three children. The community came together and has raised a lot of money for the family. Well the DJ says "there isn't enough money in the world that can give this family peace but this money will help them through this difficult time. At that point my son says "Mom, that money can bring them happiness", I quickly interjected and told him " the love I have for you is far greater than any money in the world. Well, he continued to tell me " Mom, they can use that money to adopt more children they can love."

That is one of the proudest moments in my life as D'Angelo's mother. I wanted to grab him, hug him and kiss him. I told him that he was absolutely right and that I was very proud of him because he saw the good that this family can do for someone else.


I'll have to go back many year's ago for you to understand why this conversation with my son means the world to me. When I was fifteen years old I was told that I could never have children. At that age, children were the farthest thing in my mind. I had many cousins that I took care of and loved them and that was all I needed in my life.


Many years later, I was married and we both knew that having children wasn't possible but we knew we had options. I went through a lot of "why me", why can't I have a child when so many women have them and don't want them. I was mad, truly mad but it was, what it was and I dealt with it the best way I knew how. We decided to adopt and went through the necessary courses. Unfortunately the system doesn't work very well, and there were no babies for adoption. They strongly believe in reunification and the state gives birth parents many chances before placing the child for adoption. I wanted to adopt a newborn, I wanted to get up every two hours for feeding, I wanted to watch my baby turn, teach my baby to crawl, walk and talk. I wanted it but I couldn't have it.


My wish came true and God definitely heard my prayers. My son was born and that was the happiest and scariest day of my life. Women have nine months to prepare for their child's arrival. I had one month to do it all. It wasn't real to me until the doted line was signed 48 hours after he was born.


I always wanted him to know he was adopted. I wanted him to hear it from me because I am a firm believer that honesty is the best policy. I didn't want to keep that from him and have him find out through someone other than myself. I began explaining it to him when he was about two years old but when he was five was when all the questions really started coming. I know he still has many questions and I'm ready to answer them as honestly as I can but I'm so proud knowing that he is OK with what adoption is. He doesn't feel different than his friends because that would devastate me...


Today, I know he'll overcome any obstacles he faces because he truly knows that he is my life and my love for him can withstand anything that comes our way.


Goodnight...

10 comments:

Balou said...

You have me in tears, honey. I remember when you told us the story briefly, many months ago, and I thought to myself "wow - that girl is amazing." There is no question at all that D was meant to be yours. You're a great mother (honestly one of the best I've ever known) and that comes 100% from your heart, and has nothing to do with whether or not you gave birth. The most heartwarming thing for me is seeing you two together; that kid adores you, no question. It makes you think that things turned out exactly the way God intended them to be.

jo said...

I'm at work and I'm tearing up! What a good mom you are to have raised a son like D'Angelo. You SHOULD be proud! He will grow into a great man because of having you as parents. I'm a firm believer in God and answered prayers - your story makes me even more of a believer. *hugs*

lawrenbc said...

oh my! what an amazing story! and an amazing son you have there!

Vanessa, Florida, USA said...

OK, even though you told me this over the phone, I am reading it here and have watery eyes!!! I just LOVE you and D' so much!!! You are such a great Mom, and I feel so blessed that he's my Godson. You two were just meant to be together girl!!! God always has a plan... xoxo

Rita Rivera said...

Yayi, you and D share a wonderful bond. You truly are an amazing mother. And I knew that back when you used to help me out with Mikey and Joey. Especially with Mikey because you had so much patience in dealing with my special son. I love you honey.

Maritza said...

Thank you for that story. So many emotions right now. From the family that lost their children to your son's sweetest purest straight from the heart idea. I am 1 of 7 and 2 of my siblings are adopted from agencies. I love them as if they were my own and they kind of were since I was the oldest and they were my play things.
A GIANT hug for D.

Anilu Magloire said...

I loved hearing that story from you yesterday!
He is a good boy cause he has a GREAT Mama!

Damaris said...

Hay DIOS MIO!!!!!! That boy is AMAZING!!!!!!!! But I already knew that!!!! You are doing a great job as a mommy!!! KUDOS MY FRIEND.
HUGS,
ME

Haberdawoman said...

Uuurgh! What a beautiful story.
He is not my son yet I am so proud of him. I can see that you are doing a great job at raising a fine young man for our society. Keep it up, we need young people like him in this crazy world. Thanks for the love on my blog. Oh yeah! And for your award :) Have a wonderful week. Hugs.

Margie said...

This post is beautiful. I read it at your house and I held back the tears. You are truly a special woman girl, and your son doesn't stay behind. Love ya!